No Pride

I wasn't planning to make an addition to, "A Southern Gay", but it seems my story and voice, which I'm sure, neither are mine alone, aren't being heard.  "No Pride", is quickly becoming much larger than I originally thought it would be and I'm trying to give every facet the proper amount of exposure to make sure I'm doing the whole story justice. I know I sound like a complete A-Hole sometimes, mostly because it's really difficult for me to see LGBTQ progress from where I'm standing. I recently read a lot about Andrew Sullivan and his awkward worldviews. The only thing I could think about was how did other people not already see this about him. There are other gay voices out there not belonging to Andrew Sullivan, or people like him. Then I read about how people are angry with "Angels in America" receiving more exposure while not representing women of color. Overall, these narratives sound a lot like, "...

I don't often get a lot of correspondence with any of my blog projects, which, is understandable. This month I've been asked some questions and I want to take the time to respond to them in full. I was originally going to answer the question, "Why I haven't moved out of Alabama?". It isn't a difficult answer but, it is going to take some time to fully answer. In trying to stay close to the subject of, "Southern Living" and maybe even shed a little light on the reasons why I haven't moved out of Alabama, I'm going to respond to Billy Eichner's near-sighted tweet  and expand out from my response. As I've said before, the disconnect of the gay community is real. Mr. Eichener's tweet alone absolutely, one-hundred percent, serves as proof of my statement. If there's any truth to the idea of different versions of America existing for every individual group, then Gay America is divided into the East Coast, West C...

As I've said before, there are difficulties with being openly gay and living in Alabama. The list is rather long and would possibly make you question what the current year is. It's 2018... Last year, after striking out on dating apps for months, I decided to quit while I was ahead. Being alone sucks but, it beats losing sleep over all the ridiculous obstacles one must overcome to secure a date. Besides all of my own red flags, which, I admittedly have, there seems to be a full examination I've either never cared to partake in or was oblivious to its very existence. "What are you looking for?" ... A date? People still go on dates, right? "No, what are you looking for in a relationship?" Really, just a date. We can talk about relationship goals on the third date. Marriage goals in a year or two, okay, 6 months at the least. Can I just hold your hand and talk about our interests first? "I'd like to get to know you better....

The LGBTQ Community suffers from a true lack of awareness. As I was reading  this  article, it became very clear to me. In the last year, I have read two different articles talking about the who, what, where, when, and why of gay men's loneliness and its effects. The Epidemic of Gay Loneliness ; by Michael Hobbes Gay loneliness is real but, "bitchy, toxic" culture isn't the full story ; by Ben Miller I came across both of these articles through Reddit. The response to both of these articles prompted Michael Hobbes to do an AMA  on Reddit shortly after his article was published. This is all pure context for the issue at hand.  Mr. Hobbes' friend, Jeremy, is described as being completely driven by crystal meth, cocaine, and the sex parties he would attend. Drug usage is not part of my routine, at all. I live in the South, a place often made fun of due to the rampant crystal meth addiction and I can honestly say, I've never used it.  Multiple s...

I downloaded and created profiles across several different "dating" apps earlier this year. I was on Grindr, GROWLr, Hornet, Scruff, and Surge for close to five months. A shallow selection pool of men in my area, combined with men who were only interested in hook-ups quickly made me cut back on my activity level until I stopped using these platforms altogether.  When I was active daily on these apps, I made a few decent connections but, I never went on any dates.  Turns out the selection pool was shallow in more ways than one. Maybe I'm just bitter. I'm no stranger to hooking up but, it isn't my preference. Out of all the one-night stands I've had, I can't ever remember this being my objective or intention. Of course, this was during a day and age before smartphones, dating apps, ghosting, and gay marriage. Times have changed quickly in the gay community and even more so in the dating scene. I'd even argue my lack of access to the inte...